Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Jan Moir outMoirs herself. Again!

She sprays insults around, blind to the massive contradictions that stare at her right in the face: Jan Moir is back.

Yes, her. Jan Moir. The tactless grief predator. The one who became an overnight sensation after penning a selection of vile homophobic cliches in the wake of Stephen Gately's death. The one who single-handedly clinched the national record for complaints to the PCC.

Well, Jan Moir is back. And, rest assured, she's still got her blinkers firmly on. Because she's just had a new philippic published that goes under the following headline: 'How much more of boobilicious, publicity-mad She-Chav Katie Price can we take?'

Now, dear Jan. It may as well be that you perversely enjoyed all the Stephen Gately-related backlash, what with being talked about so much and yours turning into a household name. That would explain your penchant for writing things that just don't add up. However, one may suspect you really aren't the brightest of columnists out there and that observation isn't your forte.

Because the same Daily Mail where your column is published - the very same one- sports a big picture of Katie Price at the top with the header 'I thought I was going to drown: Katie Price panics'. And it's been like that for years.

Type in 'Katie Price' in the Daily Mail's own search engine and you are returned with a whopping 796 results since 2001. Do the same with 'Jordan' and you get 3581 results and, no, they aren't about the middle-eastern country. That's almost two articles or photoshoots about "publicity-mad She-Chav Katie Price" a day.

Simply, the Daily Mail are obsessed with Jordan/Katie Price. Obsessed. So when Jan Moir touchingly writes that:
"Both [ITV and Katie Price] are desperate. The TV company needs the ratings fillip that such a controversial contestant will engender, while KP Nutty needs the prime-time opportunity to attempt to redeem her tattered reputation"
the churno may as well be calling her own employers at the Daily Mail "desperate". Why else would they publish pictures of Katie and her plastic boobs almost twice daily? Come to think of it, why else would they employ someone like Jan Moir?

The bigot-of-the-year gets carried away, as usual. Like with the Gately piece, Moir's opinions quickly give way to a torrent of verbal diarrohea. The homophobe just can't help it. Peter Andre is "dim", she writes (pot and kettle!), while adding that "[Katie Price's] mastery of the sordid remains without compare".

Which must be why the Daily Mail decided to pepper Moir's piece with stills from the ITV show where Jordan's cleavage appears particularly prominent. Plus one under the waterfall, with tits firmly on display. Sordid or what?

But Moir carries on:
"In the summer, a stunt cooked up for tabloid newspapers saw a nearnaked Price on a massage table having her bottom fondled by the cage-fighter boyfriend in the garden of a Marbella golf hotel. While children looked on. Classy".
The hack is probably referring to this "shameless" piece the Daily Mail published in August, complete with "nearnaked" photos and the caption: "no regard for modesty". Indeed a "stunt cooked up for tabloid newspapers". Classy, hey?

"[Katie Price]'s torrid attempts to gain publicity have become increasingly desperate as the year has progressed", Moir adds. In which case, rest assured, Katie, there will always be someone at the Daily Mail ready to parade your boobs to the wider public.

8 comments:

Daniel Hoffmann-Gill said...

Jan Moir should be beached...

Madam Miaow said...

Beware women who hate women.

Price can be a right pain but she shouldn't become a receptacle for all the misogynistic crap flying around.

Good post. You cut through Moir's thicko hypocrisy very well.

Helen Highwater said...

Not only does she go about with her knockers out but she also went somewhere without her children! Can you believe the cheek of the woman?

The Mail did an article on bullet bras recently:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1225331/Conical-bras-flying-shelves-YOU-wear--work.html
(4 photos of a woman in a bra, 2 photos of a woman showing her boob silhouette in a tight top).
I'm a big fan of them myself and stock up on Triumph Doreens in Rackhams. However... "If lingerie doesn't feel good, doesn't look good and men don't find it sexy, frankly what's the point of it?"

Because the sole purpose of a woman's life is to make sure men find her sexy at all times. Unless she's Jordan, obviously.

(and she must've been wearing the wrong size bra if they were uncomfortable, and "doesn't look good" surely depends on personal taste!).

Madam Miaow said...

Helen, I love the idea of spearing wandering hands with a pointy bra. I'm going to look out for one next time I'm in John Lewis. Thanks for the fashion "tip".

Darren said...

If she was the editor of the Mail and dictated the news agenda for the paper, I would understand your foaming-at-the-mouth cleverness.

But she's not. This is a comment piece. A piece that reflects the general opinion of many folk who are sick to the gills of this fame-hungry floozie. Yes, there is a vampiric relationship with the media and the cult of the celebrity, but get over it. One cannot exist in a vacuum without the other and nothing is going to change with or without your impotent sniping.

Is Moir a hypocrite? No, she is writing a comment piece and, hold steady now, she is entitled to her opinion. While the Gateley piece left a sour taste in the mouth as it featured a lot of unseemly conjecture about the nature of homosexual life and the nature of same-sex marriage, this is just spinning the backlash against Price. Pieces have been written like this before by other female columnists, so you can put your handbag down now. This is nothing new and it will continue until Katie Price rescues a one-legged African orphan from a blazing hospital or something.

As for the warning about women hating women, this is de rigeur. Don't kid yourself that the sisterhood exists because it doesn't. Women rarely stick together when it comes down to men, money and power. There is a reason why they say women are the deadliest of the species - it's because they have a killer instinct greater than the male. Witness the lioness hunting for the lion or the mantis eating the head of her partner post-coitus. Human females are no different and our booze-barmy culture highlights the violent nature under the surface of the feminine class.

That is all...

Stan Moss said...

Hey Darren,
look. It really is quite simple.
There is a woman ranting the length of a whole opinion column about the 'certain' media looking desperate for constantly talking about Katie Price.

"One cannot exist in a vacuum without the other", you say. Ex-fuckin-actly!

The same woman fails to see that her own paper is guilty of that. Exactly that. More than any other paper in fact.
The hypocrisy is stunning.

You don't see that? Good on you, but a trip to specsavers is what your GP may recommend!...

The BigotBasher said...

Jan Moir is an idiot bigot who deserves her fame as a stupid bigot.

These views however are still prevalent, witness the homophobic attacks i London and the recent homophobic murder in Brum. She just voiced them.

curito smit said...

Wooow this woman Jan Moir her lenght is the same as her middle and her mouth is even more wide! This woman will fill up the whole Olympics with her big mouth. She will be as wide from the front as the back. She is the Uberbitch!