The week's news round-up

By Johnny Taronja

They all wanna come here!

How do they work these figures out? Remember all those scaremongering surveys from ten, fifteen years ago, telling us that England would be non-white by 2001 or entirely Polish-speaking by 2010? Well, we're at it again. As a treat to our newspapers and tabloids, Eurostat now claims the UK population is set to reach 77 million by 2060, overtaking Germany as the most populous EU state.

There's been a recent tail-off of Eastern European immigrants, but don't say it too loud. Look, instead at how they're all fretting. To the horror of its readers, the Mail on Sunday makes a link with birth control and Britain's highest rate of teenage pregnancies in Europe. And so it's up to The Observer to keep up the myth that they-all-wanna-come-here. "The time has come to say Britain is full". And me thinking that East Anglia looking like a swollen gut was only due to the Brits' penchant for a bit of lager...

*****

but not on Ryanair...

And if they-all-wanna-come-here they may wish to replan their route. Because Ryanair's getting a bit too pricey...Alright, at Hagley Road to Ladywood we must have it in for O'Leary and his company but we wouldn't perform our duty if we didn't show you this piece in The Sunday Times, written by Richard Green: "Low-cost? Not with these extras.....". Not to mention the recent accusation made by Ryanair's own pilots. Now, that sounds proper bad. According to The Sunday Times, the pilots are being "pressurised flying with less fuel by imposing a cap on their safety reserves". Sorry, Al Gore. I think I'm gonna get the car next time.
*****

An end to all wars?

Reviewing the recent crisis with Russia and the chances of slipping back into Cold War-mode, The Observer's analysis is spot-on. Remember the 1990s and the certainty that globalised Western-style capitalist democracies will signal an end to all wars? "It was assumed that economic prosperity and political freedom were indivisible. As societies become richer, the theory went, a middle class would emerge to demand representation from its rulers". That illusion "resulted in a failure to understand the challenge of nationalist capitalism".

*****

Sarah Palin and those sex-desperate tabloid hacks

Talk about female empowerment. The News of The World was so happy to celebrate John McCain's selection of Sarah Palin as Vice-President that all they could knock up was this misleading piece about fake/non-fake nude pictures of the "hottest governor". While you're left wondering why they didn't do that for Joe Biden...don't you wish some multi-millionaire philantropist paid for sex workers to relieve the entire Sun/News of The World newsroom? Boy-oh-boy they need it!